Moments before Shabbat Vayakhel// for the beauty of united inspired work, to bring G()d's Presense back to Earth, & Shabbat Week ending 01Mar08

,
you take my breath away
soul escaped
depressurized
un-locked safespace
once again

no doubt
it is your brilliant thought
process
the key, your
encyclopedic mind,
ben Torah
B'Ezrat Hashem

pity for us that we cannot live
together
in this world
where there
is no air
let alone
\space, time
or form

nothing to help us
not one another



Shabbat Vayakhel Shalom
working on building Miskan,
inspired, gifted, in unity
achdute
grateful

dogstory, (Major) New Wrinkle, (Taking) Dibs on Eternity,

II. dogstory (Major) New Wrinkle, (Taking) Dibs on Eternity,

so the dog woke me up from a dream
& I hear myself, still lingering
in the REMemory space memory
of a past conversation versed as
electro-organic neural trace,
And I hear your voice,
asking the question,
the one that you called 'the acid test',
'the age-old' one: "Would you want to wake up with her,
in the morning, day after day???"

& before the last question mark floats out
of your mouth
in less than a blink, fraction
of the 250millisecond
gap from thought to
I remember
blurting out,
into what
would-be
reality:
"Wait a minute! That's just the idea!
of why we are here:
considering
holy matrimony,
that sacred covenant,
Taking dibs/ \sbid
on Eternity,
and, not, just
for the first time,
for either of us,
for you
or
for
me, as if it were already
another (re)incarnation.

"On the other hand,
Consider this:
that we,
human beings, that is,
grimace, smile, frown,
while asleep.

"For me, even more so,
because I dream, always.
{No, not what you may be thinking,
about chronic defocus, going off on tangents
'Otising',
vectored off towards
infinity
or not quite recalling
the mail in the car
or where I'd left the hand-rake
in the garden
when I'd de-gloved, to catch
the phone's ringing,
.... although this may also be true,
finding the seed envelope
for the chrysanthemums
leaning on
my favorite mug,
the one
that had 'gone missing'
when it was in fact
vacationing,
nestled sweetly
akume
/near the hedge,
next
to the old
wooden
swing,
exactly where
I had
left them.
Not that; but}
, diagnosed with
REM Sleep
Narcolepsy.

"which effectively, means
that I dream
as soon as my eyelids
flutter shut,
not quite asleep,
still hearing
surround
sound,
gossamer veiled
and
whether that interval
is to be
hours long, cat nap, or quick snooze:
at home, on the train, in class,
maybe tucked in
alone
in the
den,
with my
my favorite
fall asleep book,
under the aged
afghan,
that your
beloved mother,
May
her name
be
Blessed,
had hooked,
in Nantucket,
from the yarns
left in the blue
basket."

Practically, what does this imply?

Instead of sleeping peacefully,
serene like lake, or baby's face,

Horrifying to consider
that our facial wrinkles
will be de-constructed
not just
by conscious actions,
emotions
thoughts expressed
during waking hours

,,,,, if you call all this consciousness?,,,,,

but also by how we REACT
to what we dream,
or think
of
or imagine
or recall
as soon as REM
takes control,
while
it is happening
in real~time.
and me?
I just get
more
of it

Whatever happened to beauty rest?!?

Moving right along,
already considering
how
to
induce,
temporary
coma;

Or, as you said,
another reason
for botox, injected or applied
as cream

Always the chemist,
practical romantic

Art meets Science.
Science meets Art.
Both nod, respectfully,
to
G()d

humbled
by the accumulating evidence
of the long slope leaning
towards
the cliff edge
fall off
called
(im)mortal
i ty

y/ours

~ ~ ~

I. dogstory short morning

going out to walk the dog.
nice of her to wake me,
instead of finding a "present"
she'd left
in the morning

Error correction, FORGIVENESS, Btzelem Elokim

EGADS!!!
major faux pas: to have sent out a draft
(widely, well, important, submissions)
instead of the 'final version'
of a sensitive poem!
...what embarrassment, exposure,
aborted thought published
misconceptions generated!!!!

iNSTEAD OF THIS ONE (to follow. Post-(re-)checking)
instead
of what
should have been said
stated for quotation, trumpeted.

now dog embarrassed,
just missing the tail
between hind legs,
and if I'd had
a doghouse,
that is where
I would have skulked off to.
Again.

O FOOLISH ERROR
Haste makes trouble
beyond waste
magnified by this Internet

CLICK ADDICTION
Too quick dissemination
of what were private thoughts,
'framblings'(c)
playing w fire

oh me oh my
fooled, once more
by my own
limitation(s)
soooo sorry
though,
no one hurt
but me

NOW HOW
to move along?
what to do,
send it again?
what might be called,
'final version'
-- at this moment

OR MIGHT that just ( !! )
evoke more attention
to my public indiscretion
when perhaps no one had noticed,
(unless machmir or yeshivish,
for whom I would lose even a chance
of any further
consideration)

How could I and why?

Simply put:
An embarrassment of riches,
this thinking poetic,
flow
of poesy
now
,apologies,
feeling, lame,
foolish, heavy

now, o now,
thinking out loud,
about damage control

as if , one could revert memory,
to its pristine state
not back to baseline, more like de-creation,
Hah! once it's been cast into neurophysiology,
synaptic connection, transmitter~receptor
de novo fabrication
{Thank G()d there is more immediate
commercialization, in wireless
connections, before aromatic
mediation on the Net}
Could modulate fast(er) with drugs,
severe trauma or brain surgery,
in that order of effectivity!!!
prior to frank lesion, death.

Or, hope springs eternal: the real cure
is Intense Humor!
true laughter
, from resounding empathetic
belly rolling,
unwhorled from the length
of the gut!

This indeed, does cure sooooo much
the basis of Lasting Love,
Btzelem Elokim
Loving kindness
the kind that age's gracefully.

What we pray for
Rachmanus,
over
Din

Please G()d, May it be so,
Here on Earth.

k. adam

new explorations: Rupture or Rapture, or rapture of rupture

new explorations, new explorations

On the same day, as whenever it was,
I 'happened' to fall upon and read Rabbi Dr Haym Soloveitchik's
RUPTURE AND RECONSTRUCTION:
THE TRANSFORMATION OF CONTEMPORARY ORTHODOXY
[Tradition, Vol. 28, No. 4 (Summer 1994),
but, unconsciously, saw the title as
RAPTURE AND RECONSTRUCTION,

thinking throughout

this breathtaking flow of words
that has the rapturous\

hypnotic beauty and impact
of swelling~cresting & ~crashing surf
along the expansive
eastern seaboard of America,

What legacy these vast stretches of fine sand,
[[nothing compared to Australia]]

Not only for the eyes, but the toes
clean white,
nearly crystalline
grounded mineral, from pounding , moon-driven
sea in repetition , over millennia ,
to near perfection
to experience,

and we, present, sunbaked exposed or covered
reverent
reverie, by rhythmic
presence
leaving, humbled,
more footprints in the sand?
briefly,
until the next wave?
crashing or lapping upon the shore

Or, is the signature,
this beach, itself,
grateful, waiting for thesehuman footfalls
sand carried away, and not just between fingers and toes,
but truckloads for mixing into cement
for the next
greatest
ediface
f/or
upon which to present a new paradigm,
up
from
the feet
that walk in step
with Eternity.

With this admission in mind,
From here, I proceed.
~ ~ ~

Lost&Found, relative/ \absolute, new explorations

from the week of Parshat Ki Tiseh//

Honoring the personal , response/ability
in acceptance of The Law, week ending 23 Feb 08

I.

Everything is relative,
U R right
that I tend to leave my computer on
& forget to log out,
it used to close automatically,
but must be a function of the tabs remaining open,
now a sub-routine of a bigger program
that keeps it from closing. kind of like a lingering memory,
something memorized, that stays with you

U R also right, to wonder:
“What governs when you capitalize your nouns?”
I guess you mean outside of the grammatical,
proper nouns, titles, abbreviations, such
but I also imagine that you k/now, already,
so perhaps want to hear it
spelled out.

OK: it is abiding respect for The Boss,
to quote another source, not The Source,
but to exemplify the upper case, usage:
" Our Father, Who art in heaven,
Hallowed be Thy Name;
Thy kingdom come, . . . . "
which reminds me,

ironie,
that virtually ( ! )
all other faiths re-translate, rephrase the original texts to fit the times, the moment;
while we Jews
precisely rewrite the exact letters,
shapes, words, spacing, form,
{{more leeway in incantation}}
& if there is, even one error
this is enough to deem an entire Torah
pos'l, disqualified, imperfect
simply stated, no good to pray from,
but OK to use as a teaching instrument.

But then we Jews, re- ultra- counter- mirror- super- hyper-interpret
the dickens out of the original text.
&, as a way of coming closer to the source,
to cleaving to its deeper meaning
more introspective, more scrutinized, deeper known to ourselves,
to each other, written out from the Commentaries,
when the fear was so great that dispersal
after the destructionof the Temples,
would mean that the Oral Law, passed from Moshe to Yehoshua, et alia,
during the 40 years of wandering,
would be lost forever,
G()d forbid.

even while some would continue to argue
about the origins, even The Source, the holy names
Hashem, G()d, the Holy Omniscient, Ever- & Omni-Present,
Eternal, Infinite Oneness,, beyond our capability of naming,
even disallowed
(reference the Sefer YetziraH),
& t/herein lies the need for upper case, itself.

As I see it, it is the re-writes of the original text
that generate problems,
lead to innumerable
misunderstanding,
& specifically
because they,
the authors, and their works,
tend to invert the I-Thou relationship
not right-left, between us, but
up-down
[[also relative! except when it is Absolute - -
[[ another simile, or similar metaphor??
is scales of temperature,
i.e., like Centigrade & Fahrenheit
vs. Kelvin's absolute zero; vodka is another ]],
.... IMHO....

& hence I am (& U R . . . .)
machmir//strict,
which includes mechitzote//barriers,
respectful distance, separation, Path of the Just,
shomrim negeiyah//no touching men,
at all

taken on,
on the advice of my male Cohen friends,
{{since, as a divorce, and their Kehuna//priesthood,
we are strictly speaking, off-limits to each other,
so , perfect friends,
and natural to me from tom-boy to scientist,
with a traipse thru the arts, , , , }}

& Thank G()d:
This advice has saved me from deep anguish,
although, to my utter astonishment,
even at this mature(STS) age,
has not kept me
from being
in love's grip of passion!
which re-proved, verified by replication
of results,
that love & passion,
are both,
99% above the neck--
to be clear,inside the head, or mind,
and above that,
floating of the soul.

Love's hope, re-examined...when it looked, so perfect,. Post-Valentine,

from the week of Parshat Tetzevah~honoring Cohenim //
ending 16 Feb 08
now( so-called) & a post-Valentine post, out~loud wondering , in part(s)
I - XVIII ; living alive . . . .

I.
I guess that all that I can say, is : Lovely.
or Lov~Li, My love or love ( is) me.
But still, way too early
to speak of such things,
except perhaps, in summary,
as appropriate, since we are still in the Overturn,
as stated,
with some regret

OR, you may be correct.

Yet, how I do wonder,
how you say you can feel
with your gut (oh yes, no lack of nerve endings)
and, no doubt , even you, have felt the flutters,
despite >2 hours/day in practice & preparation
{{so I wonder, as an aside, what for,
if not for the Now, for the extra mile, then for What?? and When??}}

But, what, indeed?
in Truth, EMES or EMETT,
Based on what we've written?
not even blush nor fiber, admitted,
no blue -- pink
transition
of litmus
paper

But, yet, you plainly state,
that,
you believe ( !! )
with
no other referents,
with

nothing

but these printed words,
as expressive as they may be,
what you de-clare: 'No' chemistry.
.... when it is physics
that you say you admire, and studied?
micro- , electro- , mechanical, astro-
acoustics?

II.
Here! Hear!!
not black on white, but spectral
colour! multi-dimensioned
simultaneous equations,
& the splash of paint,
in sound
captured. . . .

when not a word was formed between us
since we halted before hearing
one another, not a note played,
pity, our ears.

But, again,
if you are so strongly convinced,
then
shall we, yes,
just ,
or not.
Let It Be
done
with

III.
May be, that it is
my error:
enthusiasm exceeeding judgment?
since , if you had not ejected,
when still with toe on ground
aborted the flight,
missed the aerial view,
worth the seeing,
avoided the heights
then,
if, Yes, it might have been me
who might in future find
that I might have to
fake a smile
{{would I?!? could I!?! for shalom bayit!!!}}
IFF, I hated your painting ((G()d forbid)),
and found your walls
were plastered with it

aargh

For me, without even so much
as a phone call,
to hear and gauge each other's voice
the soul's window
the cadence of breath

Pray tell: how can you be so sure
as to blankly dismiss
the very possibility
of an 'us'?
with so much (evidence)
wanting,
so much
yet to explore?

IV.
From another perspective
Consider that
Every day, We say out loud
to ourselves and to G()d
morning after morning, as close to dawn; Shachris:
Thank You for making me a Yehudi
Thank you father Abraham, Avraham Aveinu,
for persisting, so much, that G()d noticed you
above and beyond every other human
who lived and those who had died.
&, Since it is for this reason,
so it is stated: your realization
and breaking of idols, of graven images
that we are Jews,
ancestral chosen,
to covenant cleaving
AMV, Ad Meir Ve'eesrim,
Who would rather die,
than be prevented
from resting
on
Shabbat or Shabbas.

tested, once, and again,
and more often
than one ordinary life
may hope to
endure

V.
and there-in lies the chamsa l'chamsa~
two-hands
in mirror-image
right-and-left held together,
united, a tenor
of the realisation,
a reason in this, our,
understanding:

that no one of us alone,
no single Jew, no matter how much a tzaddik
can fulfill all 613 mitzvote,
For this body of completion,
for that
we each need each other,
and backwards and forwards in time, space,
and form

VI.
and more: the Oral Law:
To live a life of Living Judaism:
To Be T/here,
to Be Present,
to be free to explore
and to be
accounted for,

to hear while you are playing
suffused into the sound's
nourishment
one with the instrument,
getting close to pure vessel
for the Sound of The Music
(pre)conceived
as if
angelic
upon which
Hashem
forged this Universe
with love
with chesed
with intent
Shook Out chaos
parsed its
silence roaring
to make a world
to create us
enlighted by
Torah
called manual of Life,
OEM instruction book

to build us human beings
B'tzelem elokim
balanced Chachma
with Binah
to arrrive at Da'at.
aleph ~ ayin
dancing
Absolute Good,
with the possibility
(shunned , by Free Will)
of Evil

hence to center
Chesed & Gvorah
to arrive
in the middle,
perfect, symmetrical,
harmoniousdynamic,
Tiferet.

Same with Netzach and Hod,
elevated and grounded,
to Yesod,
upon which
Malchute
dor l'dor
inspired, aroused
to fill, shake,
rise, protect
and shelter.
{{ - - deserving more
explanation;
later;
promise - - }}

VII.
OK. I admit, that , yes,
so much of the(your) p'shat
your profiled features
piqued my curiosity,
OK, my interest,
OK, yes,
above many others,
and I loved our initial dynamic
encounter
albeit unbreathed,
an air of excitement,
sparkling with reality,
which , by some of your later remarks,
that I allowed to stand uncorrected,
frankly, an eerror on my part, that
may have been the seed,
wherein//therein
lies your concerns about my unreliability,
Chas vChalilah, Chas vShalom

And the promise of landing,
didn't,
was downed on your side,
by intercedance
before embarking,
by not
taking off.

But, most of all,
above all else

what it was

was about being worthy,
being meant for each other
about The Dream
to be (again, for both of us,)
foreground in
The Continuing Story,
the tikkun,
OLAM
walking the talk
, among the tribes of Yehuda,
Yosef, Levy,
(and Aaron~Kehuna)

Upright, responsible, whole,
soloists, singing,

reliable and on cue
speaking parts,
perfected beings, following the script
in duet
solo
supported
to have you,
My captain! Oh captain!
for our ship
at sea, flying before the wind
or, at anchor, in port,
ever able to soar with art
and navigate
the stars,
with science

United as one with Hashem: a man of G()d and his woman
in (mo0ments of perfection), in covenantal Love
the living Judaism
promise
fulfilled.

But this conclusion,
with no true (attempt at) exploration
let alone discovery!
let alone insight!
shows me my weakness,
Hope
and
how foolish it is,
of me, how easy to be tricked
by what could otherwise
be just a flash of teeth in smile,
or for others, blue eyes, or a perfect nose,
not to be judgmental.

VIII.
Yet, once more and, above it all,
lets me be,
me,
grateful
for having been
born
a Jewess
steeped
in our Judaic heritage
grand-daughter of a blue-eyed Cantor!
famous young uncle violinist
child prodigy
who played for the Tzar
back in the Old Country,
which alas
did not save him.
I never met him in this life .
as he died, typhus
, in the crossing, to America,
one small coffin
a generation of broken hearts
unknown even to themselves
feeling somehow unrequited
while (un)conscious of the loss

IX.
So, from talent to scholarship,
as from the beginning
cleaving to Truth,
shunning the tricks,
the obvious,
the shallow,
veneer, pshat

Our love of intelligence, of the holy mehfarshim,
those learned, of gemmorha, The Commentaries,
living scholars, the mettim waiting, for Meshiach
the reason that Hashem ,
, G()d ,
of all
and everything and more,
Why He breathed Life and free will,
into Judaic Law,
Halacha ,
wrote it into historical narrative, Torah,
levels of organization, analysis
, imbued with wisdom,
filled with clues//remez
hidden//sod
to deceive
the ill intended

X.
included an Executive Summary,
set of Ten Commandments
the entre to all:
a chamsa between Him and us ,
a chamsa, for behaviour
amongst ourselves,

Then, sent us out with a few candles
to Light Unto Nations

XI.
Which proves once more,
that His love of the music,
of the shir l'shirim
recognized by Rabbi Akiva as the single holiest song
recited by women on Friday nights,
while the men go off to daven

that what lives through us,
through our acceptance
and the continuence
that, this is the greatest
joy of Hashem ,

XII.
Though rare, O so rare, is the musician
, Hamelach David...???...HAH!!!...
who does
not fall prey
to his own melodiousness.

So yes, if my vivace or allegro disturb your andante
,,, perhaps it does mean that we are intended
not to exist
in the same,
but in separate
compositions.

If your abstract art, stops,
at the footstool of your piano,
or if, perhaps,
my lento and largoisms(sic~sci)
in
song-of-sound,
fusing with the fabric of the hearing space,
perceptually invisible, but perceptively felt!

Known only to those male musicians
who are meant to know
who it is singing, behind the invisible mechitzsa,
that sound barrier for women
to rely on men

If, this would disturb, rather than enliven you,
[[horrible thought, gives me shivers, put
apart,
so that we would remain
flat surfaces to each other,
in profile, all ways]]

Then, better off on
different continents
even to be actively avoided.

If you think that I move accelerando
when you are trying for ritardando,
then perhaps we should decide
to try a different medium,
to tap out in dance
rather than in type!
as it would be appropriate, if , when , . . if . . .
to test our feet
to test our mettle.

XIII.
. . . Or, maybe, my glimpses, and your description,
are more deceptive, than revealing,
Or, could it be that you have read
just the blurb of 'Pride and Prejudice'?

Yet, , perhaps,
No, always: to give
the benefit of the doubt,
to seek
an alternative
hypothesis:
Might it be something all together different?
that, perhaps,
you are so "laid back"
with a child's artic on a summer day,
enjoying the air
sweetened by the aroma of cut grass,
photosynthesis
exposed to our sense of smell,
by cell
walls broken
, New York State forest,
black humus rich

Might it be , that your incline,
angles you,
not to see straight?!?
. albeit Up,
into the clouds;

XIV.
So, Bless you!

once more

&
not for me or mi,
to say, or see, or si,
since, I am in No Way Convinced
that we are B'Sheert....

Although, I do take the Signs seriously,
knowing the import, of being mistaken,
and that ours is a G()d
of vengeance and din
Who takes not what lightly,
Who is Perfection

Yet Who chose to speak with Avraham, who gave dreams to Yosef
who bargained through Moshe, for our continued existence,
and his brother, the elder, Aaron who lost his sons, not all
Who gave us sainted ones, an arc, a temple in exquisite detail
Who appeared to millions at Sinai,
Who imbued our animal bodies made from earth, adama
with a soul divine, Adam, contained and held, temporarily
Who wrote Torah in holy form, rooted language, above,
to follow, to learn from
to show us how to live Exalted on this Earth
in love seeking in each other
sanctified fulfillment, holy matrimony

Who did return Life to Earth, after the Flood,
an example of forgiveness, forever, after
and so, we are invoked to pray, to be kind to each other,
beyond good
to live
vectored above
which rhymes with love,
and to pray for rachmanus in judgment.

XV.
So, back to you, who, made me feel teenaged, and wise
at the same time.
You, who embody art, music, science, and live in context
of family, frum, Haredi,
&, although, No,
No, I was not convinced,
but did feeeel so strongly
that this, yes, was worth another look
see
{ if only for the poetry ? }

XVI.
So, to make a long story endless:
if you have had the patience,
while I go on and on
ad infinitum

beware dear :
of failing your homonym,
Laser, that remarkable electromagnetic radiation,
slicing the spectrum of light, penetrating with
or without
pain
or damage,
when focused by ultraHiFUS
to pass through matter, as if
it didn't
to mark or burn, exactly at the level
point, place, intended with little or no
collateral damage
[[leaving no path nor hint of origin.
Indeed another clue//remez to what we call Creator,
and us, G()d's, chosen children! ]]

be aware dear :
of thinking that we humans
can attain anything
other than seeming
infallibility,
or the approach to perfection,
and not perfection
itself .

Remember,
we were created
to prove
the value
of striving,
"no pain no gain"
true, as advertised,
{{ahhh, but when on the wings of angels, shhhush
what a joy in the flying with,
in being imbued, in Being so near to it,
as if suspended, magnetized, polar,
alight, solid as food for its living beauty, taste, form, texture,
emanating, luminous, evanescent,
lighting the fathoms of the oceans
but more . . . .}}
and to think that this 'belongs'
to you, while knowing that all is by the grace of G()d,
Hineini

XVII.
Or maybe it is extra-simple:
that however greater
steeper inclined,
way, laid back,
slips easier, down the slope
albeit
, in the right direction

OR, to coin a phrase, Just Rock&Roll:
& , despite my hesitation
{{even now, in parting}},
recalling your aversion,
not wanting to offend you,
with this caveat,
I will refer to another popular song,,,,
from among the marvelous lyrics
from Joni Mitchell ((& many from Carly Simon---of Simon & Schuster family fame,
not to mention the other Dylan, Bob ; and many other popular 20th century poets)),
Who might speak to you, or not:

"...well you don't like slow women,
you get bored too quick,
& U don't like smart women,
'cause they're hip to your tricks...."

XVIII.
so my dear might have been, or, nevermore,
or, one more time, to be seen,
I stop here,
finally
with this parting salvo: the world is small,
and G()d loves his children, all,

Shabbat Tetzaveh Shalom,

Keren Adam

P.S. tempo, despite or thankful for the metronome, is essential, as part of, or counter-point to subjective interpretation.
Acoustical factors , the space itself, open or closed, the distance between, or intimacy of, the players, the instruments, direction, intensity, the physics of sound, influence the choice of a tempo; but account less for the divergence between different performances than does the performer's own personal interpretation.

Love, the might have been

from the week of Parshat Terumah //
ending 9 Feb 08
II.

The gap that was

was filled
as if
by water,

naturally.
with ease.and the grace.of Being
Yehudim.

Something for us to remember,
if not to forget.

For This is no trivial matter,

and, behind closed doors,
in the privacy of home,

I would hope that we would find,
in each other,

all that intimacy that ears, lips, and mouth,
and more

offer in the holy covenant of matrimony
in wanting to hear each other,

the song , the the voice of woman
in unison, for one another
muse, if not exquisite collaborator

in all, in music, which is of course
gift to Bezalel & David,

reaffirmation of love,
itself, an everlasting bond

with HaShem

bShalom

One Voice, covenantal wedded Love

from the week of Parshat Terumah // ending 9 Feb 08
I.
I got the impression of a sea change
between our phone talk & your getting sick
,there was some nature of otherness.
For Whatever reason,
I so hope that this note finds you well.
Blessings for a wonderful week.
Just returned from the third Sheva Brachote
of the loveliest young couple,

Maya Kunin & Yanky Reisel
uniting the families of

Dr. Joshua & Janet Kunin of Zichron Ya’akov, Israel
(my adopted family)

and

Rabbi Yehoshua & Rochelle Reisel of Miami, Florida, USA

I was blessed to stand among the unanimous
who said and say, with One Voice,
We are ecstatically happy, about this union
and, auspicious blessings with hopes of yet
another splendid week passed, and ahead,
Shavuah tov tov

Love lost, not abandoned, Hope Eternal

from the week of Parshat Yitro // ending 26 Jan 2008

I feel too often Too
to think about your namesake,

about why we are here,

no: I would not tell you.
but continue to wonder

what did we learn, one from the other
about caring, tenderness, separation,

need
yearning
and if this passion, shomrim negeiyah, was Lovee

Yehudim, bnai Ya'akov, Am Yisrael
scattered over the Globe,

seeking our soulmates among our
constellation of nations
to once again, feel whole,

uniting sparks, once dissociated

& I gaze out my window to devine:
how did we lose each other?

I slip into Chumash and read the parsha,

the Torah portion,

of son, Yehuda

chosen from among the twelve brothers

to father

the progenitor of Judaic royalty

Malchute

Power and Responsibility taken on

with the Rights of
ring, stamp and garments,
Given, unknowingly, as if in hypnosis,

to the beautiful woman on the street,

not knowing it was Tamar, his, twice widowed daughter-in-law

, who clung to knowing ,
from binah&chachma=da’at, as per prophesy
She, brave, determined, em~brazened,

need to be daring, to take her place

in history, rather than
remain forgotten

from among the worst of nations,
So as to trick the evil one, who in fact

did miss this moment,
carrying the good seed,

that would be our beloved King David,

But, he, that devil,

seemed to make up in vengence

what he could not do simply

straightforward

Would (have) we together, been,
the two of us, emerged from among the hidden,
high profile, glorious, what a promise!
extracted from the gutter, an accident of fate,

bad, worse,
avaricious, lustful, heavy with gratitude
for the love of G()d,

and each other.
would we have made the good, better,
winners by faith and by being
, United
?

just that

With the help of G)(d,
turned back that tide of evil counsel
made right, made tshuvah, tikkun!
Elevated the weary, the doubters,

the ill-intended.
we both knew that,

once decided,
having made the turn,
the clock could be and is reset

and was,

to a small extent

yet: instead of calling, and stating, clearly,
my answer: YES!
I whisper into my pillow, night after night
hearing the sound of your voice
as if from a great seashell
smoothcast, held to my ear
one that I'd collected,

cold, but not wet
after a meal of conch fritters
with a gin and tonic
facing The Complete Angler
with Jeanne Macdonald
Bimini, Bahamas
nee these many waves of years
past gone white sand
moving shore
now polluted dock
of condominiums

sold

I feel the one,
Two
hearts
alive,
now awake,
parted
but not un-united
nor memorex something other

as if there is, but one day to celebrate, Love

APOLOGIES FOR THE HIATUS~unavoidable, yes,
like death, & taxes,
both of which came to bear,
two funerals, two courts,
still alive,
moi, I,

Belated introduction:
Optimistic realist , Hashkafat pratistist(sic)
outgoing introspective poet~songstress
celebrating Bezalel's art, David's song;
Zionist scientist, EcoMinded communicator.
bizSch grad (11/06), Loving the world's gifts
from Hashem, seeking her soulmate b'sheert
husband partner.
& me, independent of spirit, but I love shiurim
by men, by and among women,
and other very social involvement,
chesed projects, kiruv,
then there is the art, music, song~poem
to be shared behind 'the invisible mechitzah...."
so, I would want to be, not only tolerated
{{I shiver to just write this thought}},
but loved, respected, admired, invited,
involved among the ladies of the community,
Yes, references available upon request! :::
Heads of Ohr Ya'akov Yeshiva, my chevreusa partner,
others...more, from the aspect of science, physics,
perception